How to Plan a Surprise Party

How to Plan a Surprise Party takes you through the steps of planning a top secret party that your guest of honor will love...once you've scared the wits out of her.

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To Surprise or Not to Surprise?
- That is the question that you need to ask yourself. Is it worth your while to dedicate the extra time and planning energy required to pull off a surprise party, or not?
Is this an appropriate occasion for a surprise party?
- Many occasions call for parties, but is the occasion you're celebrating appropriate for a surprise party?
1. The answer is yes:
  1. Birthday party
  2. Anniversary party
  3. Retirement party
  4. Graduation party
2. The answer is no:
  1. Holidays with set dates, like Halloween or New Year's
  2. Birthday or anniversary for an elderly person
  3. Birthday party for a pregnant woman or person with a heart condition
Would the guest of honor appreciate your time and effort?
- Surprise parties are not for everyone. A surprise party is a big trick; in order to keep it a secret, you will most likely have to lie to the guest of honor.
- Don't plan a surprise party if:
  1. The guest of honor will get upset or confused if she notices close friends having private conversations.
  2. The guest of honor is emphatic about not being lied to.
  3. The guest of honor specifically requests that you don't throw a surprise party.
  4. The guest of honor wants to plan her own party.
Are you up for the hard work planning a surprise party will require?
- Assess yourself. If you choose to plan a surprise party, you will have to create an event that will please the honoree, without consulting her, all the while getting 10-100 guests to show up on time without spilling the beans (intentionally or accidentally) and ruining the surprise.
- Don't plan a surprise party if:
  1. You lack the talent to twist the truth or your scruples prevent you from lying.
  2. You can't get other friends excited about the idea. You can't do it alone.
  3. You don't want to plan the party with limited input from the guest of honor.
  4. You don't have the time or energy to both plan and maintain secrecy.
  5. You think that someone will spill the secret or that you'll lose interest in the surprise element. It's better to channel your energy into planning great food or entertainment for the party than into something that's not going to work.
Step 1: Set the Date
- Setting the date for a surprise party isn't as tricky as it seems. Even though you have to take in a lot of information without giving any out, you've got the guest of honor's whole network of friends to help you out.
1. Check a calendar to see what day of the week the birthday, anniversary or graduation or other occasion falls on.
2. Consult with friends about the party date date:
  1. Covertly exchange information to determine the guest of honor's availability.
  2. Make sure no VIPs (best friends, boyfriends, siblings) have schedule conflicts.
3. If your guest of honor is a crafty character, consider throwing her off by having the party a week before or after the actual occasion you are celebrating.
4. Settle on the best date.
Build the guest list:
- Guests make or break the party, so invite an interesting mix of people who know how to have a good time. You want people who will fuel conversation and burn up the dance floor. But, don't invite drama queens or the birthday honoree's frenemies.
1. Invite the guest of honor's closest friends.
2. Include new friends and anyone she has been raving about lately.
3. Up the surprise by adding old friends who she would be excited to see.
4. Check with close friends to make sure you haven't forgotten anyone in other social circles.
5. Gather contact information (including e-mails) for close friends and family of the celebrant.
Invite Guests:
- Here's the tricky part: inviting the important guests to attend a surprise party without spilling the beans. But you can do it if you keep a few simple facts in mind:
1. If possible, send an electronic invitation so that there's no paper trail.
  - If the guest of honor finds an invitation to her surprise party on her brother's kitchen table, all of your hard work goes down the drain.
2. Some people have big mouths. You know who they are. Handle them carefully.
  1. Keep them out of the loop as long as possible.
  2. Inform them about the surprise party in person or over the phone.
  3. Whisper your plan to emphasize that this is not public information.
  4. Swear them to secrecy.
3. Create detailed invitations that emphasize that the party is a surprise party and should be kept secret. The invitations should include:
  1. Name of guest of honor
  2. Address and directions to party location
  3. Date and time. Invite guests at least 30 to 60 minutes before the surprise honoree arrives.
  4. For guests who have to come late, request that they arrive after the surprise. To help them out, you can suggest a post-surprise arrival time. (Ex: If you can't arrive before 7:30 pm, please help us keep the surprise a secret by arriving at or after 9 pm.)
  5. Contact name and phone number
  6. RSVP deadline
  7. Additional instructions for gifting or BYOB requests
Step 3: Create the Decoy Party Plan
- Whether it's a dinner date or a small gathering of friends, the guest of honor must be convinced that she has concrete plans. If your decoy is not believable, the surprise will lose its effect. If you actually want to catch the celebrant off guard, you will have to employ some pretty tricky tactics.
1. Recruit someone to head up the decoy effort.
  - There's no room for slip ups, so choose a keen, punctual, socially adept person.
  - You could appoint someone else to handle the surprise party, leaving you free to handle the decoy plan, but only someone who's absolutely dependable.
2. Choose a decoy activity that the honoree likes, but include only a few guests (you'll need the rest for the surprise). Some VIPs should be absent so that she will feel that something is missing. Here are some decoy ideas:
  1. A romantic dinner: A night out with her boyfriend will be great on any ordinary day, but it's disappointing when the rest of the world forgot her birthday.
  2. A small group dinner: A few close friends getting together to celebrate 30 years of marriage is a sweet gesture, but, given the state of unions these days, your parents were probably hoping for a bigger nod.
  3. A favorite activity: Going out to a bar is fun while you're in college, but the graduate might prefer to commemorate four years of toil with a more formal affair.
3. Inform guests about the decoy activity so that they can maintain the lie in the days and weeks before the party.
4. Time it so that the decoy activity wraps up 30 minutes to an hour after guests arrive.
  1. You want the guests to have fun, not get bored while waiting to yell, "Surprise!"
  2. The longer guests are there, the more they'll drink, which may lead to sloppy behavior (arguing couple, someone going out front for a smoke) that could ruin the surprise.
5. Keep in mind: the actual party must be better than the decoy party.
  - For example: Don't let the birthday girl thinks she's going to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico for the weekend only to realize that, bummer, she has to settle for a cocktail party with 30 of her closest friends.
6. If the honoree is a cunning individual with a tendency to snoop:
  1. Take the deception one step further, by throwing the surprise party at a location that she would not expect, such as an acquaintance's house.
  2. Plan a surprise-surprise party: Throw a low-key party for the honoree earlier in the week and then invite them to a surprise party. Tell them it's someone else's party. While the birthday girl waits for the supposed guest of honor to arrive, everyone turns to her and yells, "surprise".
  3. Plan an additional surprise element, such as flying in close friends or family, or printing masks with a photo of the guest of honor's face for everyone else to wear at the moment of surprise.
Step 4: Execute the Party Plan
- Your secret is still safe and you've got all of the party details planned out. Now, it's time to put the plan into action. As the date approaches, follow these simple steps to make sure that your surprise party goes off without a hitch.
Surprise Time
- This is the moment everyone's been planning for, so be prepared for giggles and nerves. Be patient! Only one more minute...
1. Make sure that everyone is quiet as the guest of honor approaches the door.
2. When she flips on the light, everyone should jump out and yell, "Surprise!"
3. Surround the honoree, who will probably be laughing and want to talk about the great surprise.
4. If your surprise party remained a secret, pat yourself on the back. If someone blew your cover, you've still got a great party to look forward too.
5. Enjoy the party! Relax, your life as a double agent is officially over.

Categories

To Surprise or Not to Surprise?

Is this an appropriate occasion for a surprise party?

Would the guest of honor appreciate your time and effort?

Are you up for the hard work planning a surprise party will require?

Step 1: Set the Date

Build the guest list:

Invite Guests:

Step 3: Create the Decoy Party Plan

Step 4: Execute the Party Plan

Surprise Time