How to Quit Your Job Like a Moron

If you've had it and you're just not going to take it anymore, you may be thinking of quitting your job. If you're a moron anyway, why not learn how to quit your job like a moron?
Disclaimer

Do not follow any of the advice on this page. Ever. Leave acting inappropriately and endangering coworkers to some other moron.

Office Stress (Crazy Office Guy)

Every great tirade starts off with a surprise. The man in this video has the process down perfectly! Note how he climbs on a desk, sends paperwork flying, throws a monitor, and even attacks the photocopier with a very large hammer. This can all be incorporated into your routine if you plan ahead.

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Introduction

If you're dissatisfied with your job, it's someone else's fault. Why not remind them of it in the most obnoxious way possible? This page shows you how to do just that in three disastrous steps only a moron would attempt.
Step 1: Declare that You Quit, Make a Scene

Start off by screaming "I quit" in a densely populated area of the office. If you can do this with customers present as well, award yourself bonus points. For extra effect, consider climbing on top of a desk or filing cabinet before making your declaration, but don't forget to watch out for the low ceiling. After making your declaration, simply throw a stack of paperwork into the air over your shoulder and dismount from your podium.
Step 2: Target Individuals

Considering the bravado you displayed in Step 1, it's safe to assume that you hate a large number of people. Start off by cornering the one closest to you and telling them how you really feel. Scream as loudly as possible. Feel free to wave your arms and make threats, but don't forget to keep it to just a few sentences so you can quickly move on to the next person. Feel free to throw, punch, kick, or otherwise destroy anything you find in your path as you move from person to person. This goes for monitors, staplers, keyboards and chairs.
Step 3: Get Out Before the Police Arrive

While you're no doubt having fun, the police have definitely been called at this point. You need to get out. You did remember to bring a getaway car to work this morning, right? Waiting for the subway isn't really an option this time. If you can't drive, you may simply have to run. Your best bet might simply be to jump from Starbucks to Starbucks until things cool off, then take the train home after a few hours.
Step 4: Where to Go from Here

After some brief self-reflection, click through to learn How to Apply for a Job Like a Moron.
Resources Powered by Google
- Similar questions with current recession times person quitting job ...
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- How to Be a Moron | eHow.com
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- YouTube - Nobody Beats The Drum - Quit your job (banned)
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- Five reasons to quit your job | Working Nomad
  
  Am I serious? You bet ya! There are many others out there quitting their jobs, downsizing, starting new businesses, living the dream, so why can't you? Do you
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- 1001 Things to do before you quit your job! | San Diego | Yelp
  
  Imagine you had just accepted the job of your dreams.Now its time to tell your current employer to **** off! Ready? GO!1. Write a sarcastic resignation letter2.3.4.5.
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