How To Destroy an iPad

Love the iPad, hate the iPad you cannot get away from the fact that the iPad is with us and it looks like it is here to stay. With many people the iPad is a very emotive topic, so much so that often violence occurs. This page is dedicated to the subject of how to destroy an iPad.

Some readers will think this page is not entirely serious perhaps but this is a serious topic. People are going out, buying iPads and destroying them. This seems odd, why would somebody pay $499+ and destroy it? In this guide we investigate the reasons why and give common sense advice on methods of destroying an iPad.

This guide is split into 3 steps, these are listed below:

  • Step 1: Reasons to destroy an iPad – This step delves into the powerful reasons why people might choose to destroy an iPad
  • Step 2: Methods of destroying an iPad – If you have decided that is it, enough is enough, this section gives some advices on methods that could be used to destroy the iPad
  • Step 3: Real life iPad destroying – In this section we provide some real life examples to prove that people are destroying the iPad for real

Step 1: Reasons to destroy an iPad

In step 1, we investigate the reasons behind why somebody would spend $499+ on an iPad only to destroy it. Here are some of the reasons:

Hatred/Contempt for Apple and the iPad

There are many people who hate everything Apple and therefore hate the iPad. This is not really anything to do with the product, this is anti-Apple. For a small minority of this group, $499 is money well spent to wreak destruction on the iPad. You could say this is a therapy of sorts. This is not just something that happens against Apple. Previous occurrences have happened with the release of the Microsoft Xbox 360, Nintendo’s Wii, etc

I got it home and it was a heap of junk

The iPad has not been for everyone. The iPad functionally is somewhere between the functionality of an iPod Touch and a Netbook unyet it is priced similarly to a Netbook. Many people have simply got the product home and been underwhelmed with its capabilities. Again in a minority of cases this can lead to thoughts of destruction against the iPad.

It’s my money I will do what I like with it

There is a breed of person who feels great power in the destruction of an iPad. This person is prone to say something to the effect of “it’s my money, I will do what I like with it!”. This is true, it is their money and they can do what they want with it.

Notoriety

Some people destroy a technology product like the iPad and before it the Nintendo Wii and Playstation 3 for the notoriety. This works best at the technology launch, where everybody is expecting people to be delighted with the product and not to want to destroy it. Often these people destroy the product outside the store, publish the video to YouTube and try to court as much media publicity as they can possibly get.

Step 2: Methods of destroying an iPad

In Step 1 you learned about the motivations behind why people might want to destroy an iPad. In step 2 the methods of destroying an iPad are focussed upon.

There are various ways you can destroy an iPad, some are listed below:

Fire The iPad is not fire retardant. One method of destroying an iPad is to ignite it. Beware: this is dangerous and not recommended. If this method were used, this should be done outdoors.

Batter the iPad The iPad could be battered. People would need to find an implement with which to batter the iPad. Examples would include a hammer or a baseball bat. Beware: If a person commits a violent act in public, this would be treated by the Police as a public order offence. This method cannot be recommended and/or advocated.

Water damage The iPad is electrical and therefore not water resistant. Even short-term exposure to water will permanently damage the iPad. This is a relatively safe method for a person to adopt for themselves, but probably does not have the satisfaction that other methods offer.

Drop from a height The iPad will not survive being dropped from a large height, say 25 feet or above. This could prove quite a spectacle and would deliver satisfaction to the owner. Beware: This is a public order offence and not recommended. If somebody walked under a falling iPad there is a risk of injury and/or death.

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