How to Deal with Bullies

If you're being bullied or know someone who is, you know how traumatic it can be. If you're at a loss and don't know how to deal with bullies, there are several steps you can take to put an end to their aggressive behavior.

If you're being bullied or know someone who is, you know how traumatic it can be. If you're at a loss and don't know how to deal with bullies, there are several steps you can take to put an end to their aggressive behavior.

Introduction

  • Bullying is a real and potentially harmful problem in and out of schools across the world. Studies have shown that, if it is not nipped in the bud, bullying will often get worse and case real and long-lasting psychological problems for those involved. If you or someone you know has become a bullying victim, try some of the strategies listed below to prevent victimization and put an end to bullying before it becomes a more severe problem.

Step 1: Ignore and Avoid

Just say no to bullies (Creative Commons photo by Chesi - Fotos CC)
  • Although it may be difficult to ignore someone who is making fun of you, bullies usually harass their victims in order to get a reaction. If a bully is making fun of you, simply walk right by without responding to let him or her know that you don't care what they say about you. Regardless of what potentially hurtful things a bully may say, keep in mind that these things are not true.
  • If there are specific times or areas where a bully tends to harass you, avoid these situations if you can. For example:
  1. If a bully always picks on you after school, joining an after school club is a good way to not only avoid the bully, but also become involved in something you will enjoy
  2. If you've become a victim of cyber bullying, don't respond, and consider changing your email address or joining another, more supportive social network
  • However, never allow a bully to prevent you from doing things that you enjoy. Doing so may give them personal satisfaction and will only make you feel worse.

Step 2: Be Confident

  • Bullies usually pick on people who they perceive to be weaker than themselves. Therefore, if you can demonstrate to the bully that you are strong and confident, they may stop picking on you. Even if you feel scared or vulnerable, try not to outwardly demonstrate these feelings. Some ways you can demonstrate confidence and stop bullies in their tracks include:
  1. Standing up straight and tall, and walking right by the bully without acknowledging them
  2. Holding your head high and looking the bully directly in the eye
  3. Responding to the bully's negative comments with humor or a joke
  4. Agreeing with the bully. If the bully is making fun of you because of something that is true, such as the fact that you wear glasses, agreeing with them may catch them off guard and cause them to stop harassing you
  5. If you feel comfortable, stand up to the bully. Don't threaten them or get angry, but talk to them in a calm, reasonable manner. Tell them that you don't like what they're doing and ask them to stop it
  6. If the bully is physically hurting you, don't fight back—you could end up in trouble yourself. Get out of the situation as soon as you can and then tell as teacher or adult

Step 3: Ask for Help

  • Since bullies usually pick on people when they are alone, try to travel in a group with your friends or classmates.

  • Don't let the fear of being branded a "rat" or a "tattletale" stop you from telling a teacher, your parents, or another trusted adult that you are being bullied. If none of the above strategies helps stop the bully from bothering you, or if a bully is harming your physically, the only way to stop him or her from harassing you may be to get an adult involved. Try to think of specific examples of when and how you have been bullied to provide as evidence and help the adults figure out the best way to confront and discipline the bully. Keep in mind that you may not be the bully's only victim, so, by asking an adult to help you put an end to a bully's behavior, you are also helping others like yourself.

Conclusion

  • Whether it comes in the form of physical, psychological or online abuse, bullying is just that—abuse. No one deserves to be bullied and the problem usually won't go away on its own. Depending on the severity of your bullying probelm, you may be able to put an end to it by demonstrating confidence, ignoring, or avoiding the bully. In some cases, asking an adult for help may be the only way to put an end to a bully's behavior, and you should never be afraid to tell your parents or teachers that you are being bullied.


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