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There are days when you just don't want to get out of bed and spend 8 hours in your stuffy cubicle. This article will tell you how to call in sick to work and have a good chance of getting away with it.
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Calling in Sick to Work Tips
- Use your "sick voice"
- Be vague with regard to your pretend illness
- Try to call when your boss is away so you get the voice mail
- Pretend you are on the mend when you get back to work
- Be sure you can afford to skip work
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Introduction
- Sometimes it happens when you wake up, look at the alarm clock and think, "Oh, no. Not today." Sometimes, the prospect of spending a day fishing on the lake removes all motivation you have to go to work. Either way, you need to let your employer know you're not coming in. You also have to do it in a way that doesn't anger your employer too much. Here's how to call in sick to work and enjoy a mental health day.
Step 1: Make Sure You Want to Skip Work
- Most people would rather have fun than go to work. Once the idea to call in sick strikes you, make sure you can afford not to come in.52 Projects: 2006 Sick Day Calendar
- Calling in sick ahead of time can make your boss question your dedication to your job.Medialine: What Do You Do About Those Who Call in Sick Tomorrow?
- - This is particularly problematic when done before or after national holidays.US Office of Personnel Management: 2008 Federal Holidays
- Double-check that you don't have an important deadline coming up.
- Look in your daily calendar or to-do list to make sure you're not playing hooky on the day of a big presentation.Google Calendar: Google Calendar
- If you don't have your daily schedule, call a co-worker to make sure this is a day you can skip.
- - Consider calling their home or cell phone; you don't want to leave a record. After all, your boss can monitor incoming and outgoing calls.USA Today: Your boss may be snooping on you
Step 2: Phoning it in: Put on a Performance
- Okay, Marlon Brando-wannabe. It's time to put on a great performance. When you call your company, you should do all you can to reinfornce the idea that you are sick, even though you're wearing a Hawaiian shirt and are about to head to the beach.Forbes: The World's Best Beaches
- Stay 'dedicated to the illusion, and don't let anyone shake you. Whether you're talking to your boss or to a secretary, don't give an inch.
- Be a method actor and get into the mindset that you really are too sick to work.About.com: Acting Tips
- Concentrate on the 'truth' that you are ill.Article North: Method Acting: Practical Exercises for the Actor
- Recall the physical memory from when you were ill. Imagine that lump in your throat. That weakness in your body.
- Analyze your character and build a profile. So. You're perfectly healthy and you really, really, really don't want to go to work today. In order to get what you want, you have to convince your boss you are too ill to go to work, but not so sick to go to the hospital. If you do that, you can watch court shows all day and eat bowls of cereal instead of poring through spreadsheets filled with teeny, tiny little numbers. Okay, you have your motivation? And...action!Judge Judy: Judge JudyThe Free Dictionary: drudgery -- definition of drudgery
- Do The Voice. You know the one; the scratchy rasp people have when they simply can't attend school or work.
- Lower the pitch of your voice.
- Push the tip of your nose to add a hint of nasality to your tone.Deb on the Rocks: Call-in sick to work ideas
Step 3: What to Say
- Just like a politician, you need to control the information you provide during your call. Here's what you should say.
- First, try to get voice mail.Life Hacker: How to Call in Sick
- If you don't speak directly to your boss, you don't have to answer any questions at all.
- Call during a time when your boss will be out of the office for a meeting or coffee break.
- Don't get too specific about your fake illness and make sure your excuse isn't complicated. That invites too many questions.Girlawhirl: calling in sick
- Express regret that you won't be at work.
- Briefly describe general symptoms.
- Remind your boss when you'll be back in and how your work will still get done on time.
- End the call as soon as possible.
- - If you talk too long, your boss might catch on.
Step 4: A Sample Statement of Freedom
- If you're not the creative type, here is a sample script for you to use. Before you make the call, break it down just as an actor would.SAC Actors: Break Down the Script
- You: (Fake clearing of voice) Hello? (regretfully) Look, this is (your name here), I'm really sorry, but I caught that thing that was going around and my throat's killing me. I gotta sit this one out today so I can be full strength for that (big project) coming up in a few days. I'm just going to drink some OJ and make some notes on the (fill in client) account. Alright, see you tomorrow. (fake cough as you hang up)
Conclusion
- After you hang up, you're free! Enjoy your impromptu day of fishing or just lounging around.Fishing.Net: Welcome to Fishing.Net
- But when you get back to work, make sure you maintain the illusion.
- Cough a little the next time you see your boss.
- Remember the fake symptoms you said you had and tell people that you feel better.
- Plan your next day off!
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