In North America, Middle School is generally considered grades 7 and 8, and in some districts, grade 6 as well. These are the “middle” years between elementary school and high school, and a time when students are between the ages of 11-14.

During this time, kids are probably still going through or finishing up pubertyhttp://kidshealth.org/parent/growth/growing/understanding_puberty.html, are dealing with acnehttp://kidshealth.org/teen/your_body/skin_stuff/acne.html, and still going through growth spurtshttp://kidshealth.org/parent/growth/growing/childs_growth.html. Needless to say, this can be a very awkward time for kids. Kids at this age are struggling to form identities, whether it be the jock, the nerd, the artist, the cheerleader, and so on. But what nearly every kid craves, whether they admit it or not, is to be popular. But just what does this mean? At some schools, it can simply mean being the prettiest girl or most handsome boy. At others, the star athlete and head cheerleader are considered the popular kids, while at a different school kids in student government could be crowned most popular. But the one thing most everyone can agree on, a popular person is generally someone who exudes self-confidence and makes others feel good just by being around them.http://www.wholefamily.com/aboutteensnow/relationships_peers/friends/popular_1.html

Not everyone is born with natural charm and self-confidence, however it is something that can be cultivated. The first and most important step is to truly like yourself. It sounds silly, but if you don’t like yourself as a person, it will show in your behavior, your mannerisms and the way you interact with others. No one wants to hang out with someone who thinks very little of themselves. But if you think you are a fun person to be around, others will as well.

Self-confidence should not be confused with arrogance. While it is important to be proud of your accomplishments and abilities, a truly self-confident person knows that while those things can make them feel great about themselves, being overly boastful about them can turn people off and make them not want to spend time around them.http://www.thechangeblog.com/become-a-person-people-want-to-be-around/

There are a lot of movies out there that depict the popular kids as gossip mongers who love to put others down.http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0377092/http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=popular%20girls Merriam-Webster defines “popular” as: "commonly liked or approved."refhttp://www.merriam-webster.com/netdict/popular</ref> Would someone who talks bad about others really be “commonly liked”? It’s highly doubtful.

Being a friendly and outgoing person will go a long way towards making you popular and well-liked. The truly popular kids, the ones admired by the majority of their fellow students, are kids who associate with a wide variety of student groups rather than just sticking with one social clique. So don’t be afraid to turn to the student next to you in class and say, ”Hi, how’s it going?” You might not become great friends with every person you say hello to, but one thing is certain—a friendly, outgoing person is a lot more fun to sit next to in class or the cafeteria than someone who deliberately and spitefully ignores you.

Even if you follow Steps 1 and 2, there are always going to be a few kids who just refuse to play nice. Learning how to not let those few students get you down is not easy, but the rewards are great. It is important to refuse to listen to or acknowledge anyone who says negative, hurtful things to or about you. Not giving in to gossip or retaliating by saying negative comments back to those people shows tremendous strength of character, and your friends will admire you for this. If you ignore this negative behavior, eventually the perpetrators will get frustrated at not getting a reaction from you and will stop. And if there isn’t any negative chatter going around the school about you, more people are going to want to hang out with you.