There are certainly situations that warrant telling a friend about his/her dating partner’s former flame(s). While it might not be any of your personal business, sometimes a tell-all facial expression or a slight hint could spark your friend’s interest in knowing more about his/her current girl/boyfriend. If you feel uncomfortable starting a conversation that will result in dishing out the dirt on your friend’s partner then you could certainly try to get her to ask you first. There are subtle clues you could throw her or you could just casually ask her during a more intensive conversation about her boyfriend whether she is aware of any of his former girlfriends. If she says yes, just ask if any of them still live in the area or whether she has even met any of them before by chance. I think that if she is still unaware of her current boyfriend (and coworker) has dated another coworker before her, she should know, because apparently most of the other employees of that company will know about the previous relationship. Her not knowing could then potentially set her up to become the office joke, the unknowing girlfriend who was held in the dark for whatever reason. Fact is, if her boyfriend has nothing to hide and if the relationship has truly ended, then there is no reason for her not to know about it. Of course, optimally it should be her boyfriend who tells her about the previous relationship with coworker XYZ. Learning this information from another source could induce doubt and mistrust in your friend. I would suggest waiting it out, even if it bugs you personally to know this information, and just give them both time to talk and adjust to the newness of their relationship. They may not be at the point where they are talking over previous relationships. Maybe the boyfriend does not feel comfortable sharing ex-girlfriend stories yet. Maybe the breakup from this other coworker was too embarrassing or too difficult in other ways for him. There could be a multitude of reasons for him not having told your friend yet, and so the only right thing to do is allow them to get the chance to talk it over on their own time. Of course, if there is any reason for you to suspect that this guy is still in any way involved with his former flame, then your friend does in my opinion have a right to know. Be careful about addressing her directly, however. Nobody likes the carrier of bad news and you could quickly become the rejected friend. Simply hand her clues. Otherwise, I would not get personally involved and let them discuss their relationship topics on their own. And if you do not feel comfortable telling your friend about what you know (even if she asked you for advice or knowledge), just be honest and let her know that you simply do not have all the information to make a valid judgment of her boyfriend’s former involvements.

Let it go. It doesn't hurt you in any way and is not your business. What would you do if an ex moved into your building or next door and didn't know you lived there. Would you want a friend to tell your current oh back in the day... Sometimes it's just best to let things run their course and stay uninvolved. And if they do decide to stay together you will always be the creep that tried to break them up.

I think that sometimes this is appropriate, while other times it is not. In the situation described in the question, I think it is fair to tell the woman involved that the guy she is seeing used to date someone else at work. That is not really private information. The best case scenario, of course, is for this guy to tell her himself. If he has not done so, I would have to wonder why not. Obviously, she is going to find out sooner or later if she keeps working at the same job. At any rate, if I were your friend I would expect that you would tell me that sort of information. If I found out that you were keeping this from me, I would really begin to question the friendship.

My advice to you is to just let it go. The only thing that you know about the former relationship is that they had one. You said "I don't know details." All you know is that he had a relationship with another person at work. If you don't know if the relationship was romantic or if they were "just friends", why partially open that can of worms? Everyone has different types of relationships with other people and gossip spreads like wild fire. The two of them obviously have quit spending a lot of time together at the office, but that doesn't mean that they "broke up." Maybe one of them was having a personal problem that the other could relate to and was trying to help. Maybe they were romantic, but it didn't work out. Whatever it was, it's actually none of your business. What if your current friend and the guy find that they are true companions, and they stop seeing each other because of something you said? If he has not said anything to her about it, maybe he doesn't consider the past relationship as any big deal. If she finds out from someone else and asks you why you didn't tell her, just tell her the truth, that you didn't know what their relationship was about and didn't find it worth mentioning. It's always best to stay out of other people's relationships, unless it's something very drastic, like you know the guy beats women, or is a pedophile, or a junkie, or something like that. If he's just a normal kind of guy, I'd keep my mouth shut.

Yeah in some cases, this is totally appropriate. In cases where the person has dated other people in the company and is known to be abusive, heck yeah I’d share to save my friend. If he pretends he is not married but you know for a fact he is, that is okay to tell any of his romantic partners. If he is a player or bi-sexual your friend needs to know so that she can protect herself.

If a friend of mine was dating a player, and she thought he was the greatest thing on earth I would certainly make a video or take a quick pic on my cell phone and show her if he was being bad. Sometimes having a photograph of something is all the proof one needs.

Sometimes telling our friends, stuff like this is hard, but it can and should be done. Armed with the information she can then ask him or others for clarification and then she can make an informed decision to date or not.

My advice is to let it go, as well. I understand how this can be an awkward situation for you. By telling your coworker you may unknowingly may stir up some unwanted drama. As long as the male coworker is not still flirting with the girl he dated, I really would not worry about sharing the information.

On the other hand, even if he is flirting with the ex, I still may not tell. I may confront him, if anything and suggest that maybe ask him if he has ever told his new love who he dated at work, prior to her. If anything you may get him thinking and perhaps he will tell her on his own.

As uncomfortable as the situation may be now, it would probably get worse if you told. I learned from personal experience, that YOU may end up being the bad guy if you try to do what is right and get involved. Good luck!http://www.flickr.com/photos/neloqua/389787755/

I agree with your assessment of someone not needing to know about the romantic past of their current significant other. However, I would take it step further and say that they don’t need to know even if the person was still around unless the person was still calling or trying to keep in contact. If this the case, then that is something entirely different.

Being that you don’t have all of the details about what exactly happened, it probably would not be a good idea to say anything. Besides is there any good that can come from your speaking about the past relationship he had with another co-worker? The fact is that all of us have a dating history. Some of that history may have been good and not so good. However, I wouldn’t want someone speaking about a past relationship because that person is in my past for a reason and the focus should be on the present relationship instead.