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2 years, 10 months ago

Why is it when people hug they frequently pat the others back at the same time?

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drmatt | 2 years, 10 months ago
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I forget the comedian who said it, but it rings true. Men do the hug with the patting to say: "I'm hugging you... but I'm hitting you!"

I haven't noticed many women who pat, but I could be wrong.

I really can't think of a psychological reason. The first thing that comes to me is what we do with babies. We tend to pat them for reassurance (or to burp them ;-). It might also be an indication of emphasis. It's not just a hug... it's a hug with a thump!

I'm sure there's a cultural reason for it... Since other cultures certainly see touch and hugging differently.

Interesting question...

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rajindersoni | 2 years, 10 months ago
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When people hug, they frequently pat the others back at the same time just to show courtesy towards them and the feeling of likeness.

Patting the back while hugging demonstrates love and affection also and sometimes it is done for giving appreciation to a person. It is a normal human behavior and it comes from within the HEART.

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jeansquared | 2 years, 10 months ago
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Based on my personal experience, when everything is already messed up, I just give someone (a friend or a lover) a hug without saying any word because sometimes it's already enough that you show to that person that you're there with him/her. I just hug the person and pat him/her on the back - it's my other way of telling that everything's gonna be alright.

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awesome222 | 2 years, 10 months ago
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I'm a back patter and the reason i do it is because hugs are very random in the first place. Patting someone's back in the process sort of makes it less serious and will ensure they won't linger on for too long when im also hitting them in the back. They hug usually ends more in a laugh than some touchy feely moment, which suits me better. Since most people close to me know of my back hitting, they are more likely to wave goodbye than smother me..
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brittany_poteat1621 | 2 years, 10 months ago
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Hmm. well patting someone on the back means that you care, are proud of them. So therefore a hug is a friendly way to show that you care.
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drmatt | 2 years, 10 months ago Report

Pride might be the meaning for you, but I don't think that is the meaning for other people (in general).

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