Why is it that people don't trust me?
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M$4 Answers
I know it's hard to gain the trust of others but if you're sincere, then for sure they'll open up their hearts for you. To earn others trust, you must also learn to trust people as well. :)
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M$
1. You make poor eye contact when you are talking to them. Looking down or away while you are speaking with someone indicates evasion.
2. If you have developed a reputation for not living up to your promises. Do you show up on time and turn in your projects on time and do the work well?
3. If your non-verbal communication does not agree with your words. As with the eye contact issue, if you body fidgets or if you wring your hands or turn away from the person you are talking to, this sends negative signals.
4. If you have trouble trusting others that would make them less likely to trust you, especially in the area of honest communication. For instance, if you are a perfectionist and are super-critical of other people's actions and work results, then will be less willing to be with you or work with you in an honest manner.
5. If you have poor self-confidence and it shows, people may not have confidence in you, especially in important matters. If you aren't willing to take risks, that will indicate limitations in your self-confidence and limit your opportunities for growth and trust in others.
6. If you have poor strategies for communication and an inability to listen, this will not foster open, honest communication. I was listening recently to a CD series on Non-violent communication by Marshall Rosenberg, where he stresses honest communication that is based on developing an inner awareness of your feelings and basic needs. This may not seem relevant, but if one is not in touch with themselves, you can communicate in a manner that is not true to yourself, nor true to others, and it will not be of service to you or others. Developing skills in empathy are necessary.
Here are some basic beliefs of those who can build trusting relationships:
1. Belief in the fairness of life. What you give to others will come back to you. You see your role as a part of a network of those who nurture life and make it richer.
2. You are aware that there is a power greater than yourself. This belief allows you to let go of disappointments, guilt and anger and look forward with hope. Your trust in that power can guide your life.
3. You develop trusting relationships to create your own nurturing environment. Some people may not be a part of that environment, but that is life. Start with the people in your personal life and work out from there. In this environment you can resolve difficult issues with safety.
4. You realize that you need to work with others and that jealously and defensive attitudes are at odds with developing trusting relationships.
5. You recognize the negative self-talk and work towards developing means of non-violent communication with yourself as well as with others.
6. You are willing to be honest and open with others.
7. You are willing to becoming vulnerable. If other people become aware of your weaknesses, as well as your strengths, they will trust you and be able to contribute where you need help. This will help develop trusting, mutually beneficial relationships.
8. As you trust in a higher power, you can let go of timidity. Timidity restricts honesty with others and that is essential in the give and take of relationships.
You can leave an optional "tip" with Mahalo's virtual currency, Mahalo Dollars. If you are asking a difficult question that might require some research, or if you'd like a wide variety of feedback, a higher tip often leads to more answers to your question.
M$You can leave an optional "tip" with Mahalo's virtual currency, Mahalo Dollars. If you are asking a difficult question that might require some research, or if you'd like a wide variety of feedback, a higher tip often leads to more answers to your question.
M$Try it and you will find out why.
Have a good day.
You can leave an optional "tip" with Mahalo's virtual currency, Mahalo Dollars. If you are asking a difficult question that might require some research, or if you'd like a wide variety of feedback, a higher tip often leads to more answers to your question.
M$
