Whats your best dirty limerick?
If you don't know what a limerick is please feel free to discover from the links here:
Warning: Dirty limericks is not quite made for children.
Wikipedia article on limericks:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)
Some examples from YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqqtpMKS77Q&NR=1
http://www.youtube.com/watch#v=GmW_XMSyehM&feature=related
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M$11 Answers
"There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose c**k was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
Wiping sperm from his chin
If my ear was a c**t I could Fuck it!"
I learned it while working at the Renaissance Pleasure Faire.
No one ever let anyone get past "Nantucket".
It was kind of a game.
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M$There once was a fellow McSweeny
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be couth
He added vermouth
Then slipped his girlfriend a martini
Makes me giggle every time...
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M$
....that is definitely a good one!! That poor dog...did he really need to be brought into this??
p.s. I found the dog that put little Martini in a funnel...
There was a young girl from Rabat
Who had triplets: Nan, Tat and Pat.
It was fun in the breeding,
but hell in the feeding,
as she found she had no tit for Tat.
Animals of course dont have this problem, doggy girl here has plenty of tit for cat!
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M$
There once was a bunny named phuphu
Who liked to dance in a tutu
One day on a dare
she skipped underwear
when she bent over the view was a lulu
my brain
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M$
The Conservative Bunny Union (CBU) as deemed your limerick as lewd and lascivious.
*please note that limericks aren't really any good without the L&L label
there once was a woman named Jill
who swallowed an exploding pill
they found her vagina
in North Carolina
and her tits in a tree in Brazil
my second favorite is
there once was a plumber from Lee
who was plumbing his girl by the sea
she said Stop your plumbing,
there's somebody coming!
said the plumber still plumbing... It's me!
***Hopefully neither of those were in the videos my sound card doesn't work!***
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M$
I love the exploding pill too! That's one of my favorites.
I THOUGHT I'D TYPE FOR YOU IN ALL CAPS SINCE YOUR SOUND CARD ISN'T WORKING... THAT WAY YOU CAN STILL GET A VISUAL LOUD EFFECT GOING.
(giggle)
lmao....thanks Bunny!!! Leave it to you to make me nearly pee myself!!
Whose balls were of different sizes
One was so small
'Tweren't no ball at all
The other one won several prizes!
Learned 30+years ago, no source.
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M$known for her enormous vagina
as wide as the Grand Canyon
you can fit a whole man in
and deep enough to tunnel to China
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M$had a mouth near as big as an acre.
On an overseas trip,
she fell off the ship,
and blew the whole isle of Jamaica
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M$
Mary had a little lamb,
She also had a duck,
She put them on the mantelpiece,
To see if they would make friends....
Mary had a little bike,
She rode it back to front,
Every time the wheels went round,
The spokes stuck up her inside leg
Old Mother Hubbard,
Went to the cupboard,
To get her poor doggy a bone,
When she bent over up popped Rover
And gave her a bone of his own*
*I think that can be attributed to Richard Digance, very funny gentleman.
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M$
There was a young girl called Annie
who had a peculiar fanny
she went to the doc
he said thats a c**k
now everyone calls her Danny.
And...
There was a young lady from Eeling who had a peculiar feeling
she lay on her back and opened her crack
and came all over the ceiling
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M$
Whose limericks stopped at line two.
I'm sure it would have gotten dirty soon...
My brother. But I found a version of it here:
http://www.kith.org/logos/words/lower/l.html
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M$
OMG! You win the L&L... hands down! (sorry Wayne)
I love it!
Hands down...hilarious.