1 year, 11 months ago
via health-qna.com
What are some things to consider when getting ready to hold an intervention for a loved on suspected of having alcoholism?
My family is getting ready to hold an intervention for my nephew who, we believe, has alcoholism. He is young and in trouble with the law. We are worried for others around him, as he has been known to drive while intoxicated. He seems to need to drink alcohol every day. We know we need to step in and hold an intervention, to save his life. Please share any tips or things we should know prior to holding the intervention for his alcoholism. 
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M$1 Answer
I will pray for you and your family to be successful in your intervention. Trust me your suspicions and beliefs are more facts than you think, if things have progressed this far to a planned intervention then you nephew is only short a MDs medical diagnosis in having alcoholism. I work with alcoholics weekly and I see this a lot.
What to expect?
- anger
- rebellion
- possible violence
- denial
- overreaction
- escape
- crying
- frustration
- indignation
- complete failure
An intervention is like jumping into a fire with gasoline to put it out.
Get the help of a professional if at all possible here, this is hard and can be dangerous.
To prepare the best thing to do is lower expectations, this will likely only be the first step of many, your nephew is lucky to have family and friends here to suggest help to him. Be prepared to do the intervention again... and again.
I am a recovering addict and I can say from my experience and the observed experience of others that we almost n e v e r get it the first time.
Another thing to keep at the forefront of the plan is the knowledge that your nephew is very very very sick. He will not be operating in a clear head.. not from the booze in his system necessarily but from what the booze has done to his brain. He is gravely mentally ill and will be unpredictable in his reaction to this intervention.. your plan must include sensitivity to this while remaining 100% firm in your intentions... you want him to drop everything.. yes everything ...and get to a treatment program today.
As this is the first intervention this will be less formal than the next one but you still should have a recovery plan set up for him to get into right away, you should be ready to cite every example that you have as a reflection for him to see himself as you the intervener do, try to do this when he is not drunk.. likely will not be possible but do your best, notify his doctor that this is your intention because if he is physically dependent on alcohol then he will probably need professional medical attention to safely detoxify from the booze, be ready to 100% follow through with the planned consequences for his refusal of treatment .. tough love will test your better angels here, and above all else you have to remain focused, calm, and collected.. he will 100% test all of you...and probably viciously.. either with words or physical attacks.
Each intervention is a bit different so this is a good framework to begin with but you and the rest of the intervention will have to think, act, and react on your feet a bit. Keep you intentions at the front and remember he is sick.. very sick and his mind will tell him he is not.. he will believe this.. and not you... be careful and good luck.
What to expect?
- anger
- rebellion
- possible violence
- denial
- overreaction
- escape
- crying
- frustration
- indignation
- complete failure
An intervention is like jumping into a fire with gasoline to put it out.
Get the help of a professional if at all possible here, this is hard and can be dangerous.
To prepare the best thing to do is lower expectations, this will likely only be the first step of many, your nephew is lucky to have family and friends here to suggest help to him. Be prepared to do the intervention again... and again.
I am a recovering addict and I can say from my experience and the observed experience of others that we almost n e v e r get it the first time.
Another thing to keep at the forefront of the plan is the knowledge that your nephew is very very very sick. He will not be operating in a clear head.. not from the booze in his system necessarily but from what the booze has done to his brain. He is gravely mentally ill and will be unpredictable in his reaction to this intervention.. your plan must include sensitivity to this while remaining 100% firm in your intentions... you want him to drop everything.. yes everything ...and get to a treatment program today.
As this is the first intervention this will be less formal than the next one but you still should have a recovery plan set up for him to get into right away, you should be ready to cite every example that you have as a reflection for him to see himself as you the intervener do, try to do this when he is not drunk.. likely will not be possible but do your best, notify his doctor that this is your intention because if he is physically dependent on alcohol then he will probably need professional medical attention to safely detoxify from the booze, be ready to 100% follow through with the planned consequences for his refusal of treatment .. tough love will test your better angels here, and above all else you have to remain focused, calm, and collected.. he will 100% test all of you...and probably viciously.. either with words or physical attacks.
Each intervention is a bit different so this is a good framework to begin with but you and the rest of the intervention will have to think, act, and react on your feet a bit. Keep you intentions at the front and remember he is sick.. very sick and his mind will tell him he is not.. he will believe this.. and not you... be careful and good luck.
source(s):
personal experience
personal experience
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M$
I am so happy to help in any way I can.. I want to add one more thing.. he just may drop to his knees and thank you the moment he sees what is going on.. I have seen this happen too and he might be ready to get help and just waiting for someone to help him get it.. to tell him it is okay.
If he trembles when his BAC is low then he will likely need an at least medically monitored detoxification (regular blood pressure checks, insurance of hydration, watching for seizures and hallucinations) but on the bright side of that any physical attack will be minimal.. he is not strong enough to fight much. The presence of a full grown man should be enough to dissuade any real physical contact.. especially that escape is easier..we the cowardly alcoholics like the easy way.. he will more likely choose to run away than to actually hit anyone I just wanted to put that out there as a possibility to foresee.
You can do it.. it wont be easy .. but it might be easier than you think.
@buddawiggi I am going to have my family read this. I had to read it twice. I guess my biggest fear was him feeling attacked. But I need to remember to stay firm. I love my Nephew so much and feel bad. He has had a rough life. His Mom (my husbands sister) lost custody of him when he was very young. My husbands parents quickly took custody of him and his sister. They had great intentions, but we tried for a year to get the kids. My husbands parents are not well themselves and we planned on another disaster. I can not even imagine how he really feels with no Mom a Dad who is an alcoholic and just no stability. I am going to stay strong. I know this is now a life or death situation. He will need detox. He trembles if he does not drink. Thank you so much.