Ask questions via twitter! Message any question to @answers on twitter. We'll publish the question and send you a reply each time there's a new answer.
Next Question

Answered Question

r_elizabe... r_elizabe...
 
M$1 October 30, 2009 04:43 AM

If one of your relatives or friends is constantly making homophobic or racist comments, how would you handle it?

Would you be more likely to confront them if it directly offends you? Or, would you be more likely to confront them in defense of another person who is reluctant to speak up?
Interesting Question?  Yes (0)   No (0)   
RSS
 
 

Best Answer  Chosen by Asker

suzalicie suzalicie
 
 October 30, 2009 02:59 PM
I tend to be one of those people who likes to keep the peace, but when I get offended or bothered I have no problem confronting the person who is bothering me. I do try to maintain civility and not sink to a low level, but simply point out my opinion and agree to disagree. I just had to deal with this over an examiner post I wrote about same sex marriages, my family is very religious and everyone was very up in arms and quoting bible verses. Maintaining your opinion and sticking to your guns can be difficult in the face of that much opposition. Being respectful of elders and family members can also be pretty difficult in that situation too.
Source(s):
personal experience

Asker's Rating:
• I chose this as best answer because I learned from it. I really wish I could have chosen several of these, but I couldn't. I learned that sometimes we need to think before we speak. We need to handle opposing views in a civil manner. We need to remain respectful even when others are not. I have always felt it was difficult to stand up for what I believe in without being vocal about it, but this answer taught me that I can oppose without being disrespectful.


Helpful Answer?  (1)   (0)   

Helpful: r_elizabeth_c_kitchen

Tip suzalicie for this answer
Permalink | Report
   Reply  
 
 
r_elizabet... r_elizabet...
 
October 30, 2009 11:15 PM
That would certainly be difficult. I am extremely blunt and just burst out with whatever I am thinking at the moment. When I feel strongly about something I find it impossible to hold me tongue. I respect the fact that you think before you speak and try to maintain the peace. I have always had a hard time with that and wish I could take your approach.

Report
 
 

Other Answers (4)

Sort By
lidyax lidyax
 
October 30, 2009 05:31 AM
Depends on your culture. In here, correcting or confronting people is considered rude. If you found their behavior is unacceptable, just ignore or avoid them. Best way to handle this in my culture is to change the topic.

If they are my relatives, I will just ignore them. People here are mostly homophobes because of the culture, so everyone will make homophobes joke one way or another. Same goes with racism. I generally don't mix with my relatives except on special occasion.

If they are my friends, I will try to explain that homosexuality is not a disease or mental illness, if they cannot accept, i can't blame them as my society and the religion hasn't accepted homosexual behavior. if they annoy me too much i will consider not befriending them anymore.

Helpful Answer?  (1)   (0)   

Helpful: r_elizabeth_c_kitchen

Tip lidyax for this answer
Permalink | Report
   Reply  
 
 
r_elizabet... r_elizabet...
 
October 30, 2009 06:03 AM
I never thought about the cultural standpoint. May I ask where you live?

Report
 
 
lidyax lidyax
 
October 30, 2009 09:26 AM
Indonesia, but I'm Chinese. It's basically the same with most Asian culture I think.

Report
 
 
tealmyster tealmyster
 
October 30, 2009 05:40 AM
I would simply tell them to keep their opinions to themselves. Yes everyone is entitled to their own but that doesn't mean everyoe wants to hear them. :)

Helpful Answer?  (0)   (0)    Tip tealmyster for this answer
Permalink | Report
   Reply  
 
 
ilovebookz ilovebookz
 
October 30, 2009 01:35 PM
I tell them politely to keep your opinions to yourself. Not everyone thinks the way you do and not everyone wants to hear your derogatory comments. I have actually said that to people that are constantly calling gay people the "F" word or black people the "N" word and so on.

Helpful Answer?  (0)   (0)    Tip ilovebookz for this answer
Permalink | Report
   Reply  
 
 
lgalatea lgalatea
 
October 30, 2009 08:32 PM
If it was a friend that I spend a lot of time with, I'd say, "You do know that making crude comments like that is uncool, right?" or, "You're kidding right? You don't think that's funny, do you?"

Helpful Answer?  (1)   (0)   

Helpful: r_elizabeth_c_kitchen

Tip lgalatea for this answer
Permalink | Report
   Reply  
 
 
r_elizabet... r_elizabet...
 
October 30, 2009 11:13 PM
I really like this approach. It allows you to voice your opinion without having to be "mean". This would probably help to avoid an argument as well.

Report
 
 

Answer this Question

How tips and payments work

This question has already been resolved. You may add an answer to it but you will not be eligible to win best answer or any associated tips.

Related Questions

View All Social Issues Questions

Ask a Question


140 characters left
Top of Page
Buy Mahalo Dollars with Credit Card or PayPal

Top Members

This Week All Time
  • buddawiggi
    buddawiggi
    2nd Degree Black Belt
    27808 Points
    M$799.16 Earned
  • opher
    opher
    Purple Belt
    4473 Points
    M$196.22 Earned
  • annelisle
    annelisle
    Purple Belt
    3110 Points
    M$95.22 Earned
   See All
 

Most Popular Tags

mahalo(1625)
twitter(953)
iphone(466)
music(462)
google(358)
food(321)
internet(307)
online(296)
beer(279)
money(262)
movies(260)
facebook(255)
apple(251)
aotd(235)
answers(228)
health(220)
video(208)
free(206)
dog(205)
windows(198)
   See All
 

Categories

Welcome New Members


 
 
Mahalo Dollars are the currency of Mahalo Answers.

Each Mahalo Dollar costs $1.

Once you earn more than 40 Mahalo Dollars, you can request to be paid via PayPal. Each Mahalo Dollar is currently worth $0.75 when paid out via PayPal. Learn More

 
 

Please log in to use this function.

Answers Home | Ask a Question | Earn Points | How Tips Work | Widget