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hercarsma... hercarsma...
 

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 M¢25  Funded By Mahalo ? |  August 28, 2009 09:13 AM

How can I forget about something really bad from the past and just go on and live happily?

there are some things from my past I call them "ghosts" that are still haunting me and I cannot find happiness since whatever good is on my way, my ghost manage to get rid of it...
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rishiku rishiku
 
 August 28, 2009 12:19 PM
I have the same problem. Mine is a little bit more pathetic in a way but it still haunts me.

A) Talk to a friend or parent, see what they think and if they can help you to get over it.

B) Talk to a Shrink (trust me its not that bad to talk to one), just be careful a lot of them are real quick about throwing you to meds. (I met mine once and she tossed me on 4 different pills)

C) If its something like rape, then become an anti-rape spokesperson. Get out there and help other people that might be having the same problem. You would be surprised as to how much helping other people with the same problem can help you.

D) Confront your fear. Look it in the eye and say Yo, back the F*** up off me. (I kinda tell that to myself when I start to feel depressed, Yes... I yell at my feelings.)

E) When you feel it coming to bother you just try and do something happy, don’t try and just "forget about it" forgetting about it is like running away, wont help in the long run. Try and just put it to the side for now.

F) If it is something recent, well its just going to take time. Might take 10 years!
but just remember that you can overcome it. Nothing is better strong then you, you are the QUEEN (I assume from the picture you are female) of your domain and you run this S*** not no one else but you.

If you need someone to talk to I am sure a bunch of mahaloian wouldn’t mind listening (and if that’s wrong....well I’m a big guy so I count as a bunch!)
Asker's Rating:
• Yeah that was the answer that I needed. I love step by step guides of all kind and your answer was something like that.
I liked the idea of helping others in order to help myself. It really works!
confronting my fear is also brilliant, instead of swearing at myself I will swear and yell my fear at.

Yeah I AM THE QUEEN OF MY DOMAIN and of few other things!!!
THX a lot mate :o)
if whenever you need someone to talk to I am here !!


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slatterboy slatterboy
 
August 28, 2009 10:23 AM
completely forget about them. treat your self to something nice and just let the ghosts leave. your are holding them down and if you just let go they will leave you and you will feel better

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hercarsman... hercarsman...
 
August 31, 2009 10:34 AM
thx a lot for your concern :o)

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harold5187 harold5187
 
August 28, 2009 05:51 PM
You ask a very good question, if you ever find the answer, please share it with all the soldiers coming back from combat...

All I can tell you is, we all have our demons, and if you don't find a way to live with them, they will eventually conquer you from the inside out! Find something you love, and do not dwell on the negative. Sometimes doing good things for others, will take your mind off of how you feel about yourself!

And always realize that you are not alone, and that there are other people in this world, perhaps even next door to you, that are struggling just the same as you! Always remember that no matter how bad something is, there is always something worse that has happened to someone, somewhere else!

I hope this helps!

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hercarsman... hercarsman...
 
August 31, 2009 10:36 AM
Thank You for these valuable words :o)

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motherjj motherjj
 
August 28, 2009 07:30 PM
It sounds like these "ghosts" are incidents or people that you did wrong to and the only way you can eliminate things like that is to mentally convince yourself that you can go on from this day forward and do good things in your life to amend the past. If it involves someone who has past on and you find it difficult to live your life as you did in the past, you need to remember and dwell upon the good memories of that person to keep them alive for you today in your heart. You may still have some incidents when the grief comes back and you need to cry and work through it. The grief really never goes away, you just need to have that person in your heart and continue to live as if he or she were still here as that is what they would want you to do. I lost my daughter to suicide 13 years ago at the age of 38 and to this day I have a few incidents when I regress to the grief, (I hear a certain song etc) BUT I know that my daughter is with me in spirit and I hold my memories of her close and dwell upon those when I have these incidents. Life is a road of challenges that we have to deal with and how we deal with them is how we live.
Source(s):
personal experience


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hercarsman... hercarsman...
 
August 31, 2009 10:36 AM
take care and do care of the good ghosts from your past ;o)

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justdani justdani
 
August 29, 2009 12:02 AM
This article "How to Get Your Power Back" helped me a lot:

http://www.oprah.com/article/spirit/knowyourself/pkgempoweryourself/ss_know_authentic_01

There you can read:

"She survived a brutal rape and overcame it…to become more powerful than ever.

When this mother lost one infant twin, she felt like she lost all control in her life. What can she do to restore her power and her joy?

More 'soul tools' to build real power in your life."

And, hey, I wish you the best!
Hope you can find happiness as soon as possible!


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hercarsman... hercarsman...
 
August 31, 2009 10:37 AM
I appreciate your concern, thx a lot for happy flowers:o)

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justdani justdani
 
August 31, 2009 03:18 PM
We're welcome!

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gaduputi gaduputi
 
August 29, 2009 09:06 AM
To forget the bad first live in the movement , by constant observing your breath to get ride of all your negative thoughts.
Experiment it like ; take a comfortable posture for sitting and concentrate on your normal breath with your closed eyes. just spend at your leisure hour at any time in the day , when you concentrate on your breath the continuous roaming thoughts will make the forget the observation of breath , you must recognize the situation and try to continue of observation of breath. when you are decided to achieve it , the thought pollution will be drastically reduced there by the energy loss will be less. when you concentrate for more time you will observe some thing in your eyes , co lours or flowers etc , concentrate on it without any thoughts finally you will be thought less stage . you will be in BLISS.
Source(s):
meditation experience


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hercarsman... hercarsman...
 
August 31, 2009 10:40 AM
it really works thx ;0)

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vicgoodwin vicgoodwin
 
August 30, 2009 09:36 AM
You can not forget. What you can do is learn to move past it. Take what you can learn from the experience and apply that to your life.

If someone was mean to you then you can make the decision not to hurt others and eventually you will make peace with your bad experience and turn it into a positive.

You should also talk about this with a trusted friend pastor or family member.

The main thing is to not try to forget, instead forgive and accept it and use it to help you grow.
Source(s):
personal experience and therapist advice


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hercarsman... hercarsman...
 
August 31, 2009 10:39 AM
thank you for your answer :o)

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