I get someone to hook up with on the rebound. I'm not one of those "too early" or "don't take advantage of me" kind of people. I'm more like "Rebound hook ups make me feel really good, and help me get over the other person really quickly".

You don't get over it by wondering when it will happen. You have to go through the stages. These are the same stages you face when facing the death of a loved one.

1. SHOCK & DENIAL-
You will probably react to learning of the loss with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the loss at some level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.

2. PAIN & GUILT-
As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it with alcohol or drugs.

You may have guilty feelings or remorse over things you did or didn't do with your loved one. Life feels chaotic and scary during this phase.

3. ANGER & BARGAINING-
Frustration gives way to anger, and you may lash out and lay unwarranted blame for the los of the relationship. Please try to control this, as permanent damage to your relationships may result. This is a time for the release of bottled up emotion.

You may rail against fate, questioning "Why me?" You may also try to bargain in vain with the powers that be for a way out of your despair ("I will never drink again if you just bring us back together")

4. "DEPRESSION", REFLECTION, LONELINESS-
Just when your friends may think you should be getting on with your life, a long period of sad reflection will likely overtake you. This is a normal stage of grief, so do not be "talked out of it" by well-meaning outsiders. Encouragement from others is not helpful to you during this stage of grieving.

During this time, you finally realize the true magnitude of your loss, and it depresses you. You may isolate yourself on purpose, reflect on things you did with your special person from the previous relationship, and focus on memories of the past. You may sense feelings of emptiness or despair. You invested a lot of time and heart.

5. THE UPWARD TURN-
As you start to adjust to life without special friend, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your "depression" begins to lift slightly.

6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH-
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life without your loved one around in your life. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life without him or her.

7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE-
During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this tragedy. But you will find a way forward.

Get engaged in as many activities as possible - even if they make no sense to you and even if you don't feel like doing them. Make an effort, make yourself do it. You will at least have a feeling of accomplishment.

First, you have to "accept" the reality - as something that happened in your life no matter harsh or bitter. It may take time at first before one can really accept what happened. In contemplating at the things that happened, one doesn't have to justify things or actions since in most cases, you would end up not really accepting what happened and instead blaming oneself or others. Self-pity and pointing an accusing finger at others do not help one accept the reality. It is only when we accept such realities and learn from them do we move on in life.

'>free chat lines can help you with moving forward to your old relationship?

Old relationships are like alcohol:
good while it lasted, and a true headache afterwards.....

and the only thing that diminishes its effects is time.

Occupy yourself with lots of 'distracting' things (hobbies, movies, music, work etc) till you don't even think about it anymore. Or care.

Getting into a NEW relationship usually helps!

I usually cry for a while, then I find something constructive to occupy my time. I create something, clean something, etc.

Well, usually I will cry for a couple days. Write down all my feelings in poetry or anything. I will try to talk to the guy.. you know to get some closure.. and then I will go out on other dates, trying to forget him.

First, let me say, I'm a naturally pig-headed individual. Now that we've got that out of the way, it helps if you move on to the best friend or the sister.