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3 years, 5 months ago

How do you get your children to go to bed on time, without bribing them?

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ssmacd | 3 years, 5 months ago
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You need to be firm, and consistent--which takes effort. It helps if there aren't "interesting" things going on in the house at bedtime--no adult TV, music etc, so they don't feel that they're missing something by going to bed. With older children, taking privileges away if they don't comply may help, but with younger children, its just a matter of consistently responding with "Its time for bed now" and escorting them back to their room--over and over again.

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lelah | 3 years, 5 months ago Report

I can remember as a child never wanting to go to bed if my parents were up doing something interesting like watching a movie or working on a project or listening to music, because I didn't want to miss out, so I think it is a good idea to take those temptations away--at least for a few minutes until the child can fall asleep.

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mollyfud | 3 years, 5 months ago Report

We did this with our kids and it worked for us. Just put them to bed and if they get up, don't talk to them, don't tell them off, just (without saying anything) put them back in bed. The first night might take 20-40 times but they get the idea that there is no use in getting up. You have to be strong and not make it fun. Put a slightly unpleased/angry face and over and over again. Not rough, but no kissing (after the first time of course).

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girmant | 3 years, 5 months ago
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it's an uphill battle - kids are programed NOT to go to bad on time -period!

according to my kids - sleeping is boring, and they get tired trying to fell asleep, and they want to be grown-ups, so they don't have to sleep at all....

good luck my friend:)

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darcy logan | 3 years, 5 months ago
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I used to be an ADHD coach. Whenever I talked to parents about rewarding their kids for good behavior the word "bribe" came up. A former college professor once told me some sage advice: "A bribe is paying someone to do something they are not supposed to do. A reward is paying someone to do what they are." Giving your kids a reward for going to bed on time is not a bribe, it is a reward. Life is filled with rewards. You go to work because you are rewarded with a paycheck.

One tip that I gave parents was to set a timer by the kids bed with 30-60 minutes on it (depending on how big the problem was). When you tell them to go to bed, start the timer. When the child is in bed, turn the timer off and take it with you. If the child gets up again, start the timer and put them back to bed.

The child earns the amount left on the timer and can use it in different ways (depending on the parent/child). They can use the time to earn extra TV or video game time, stay up later on a Friday or Saturday night, cash it in for rewards such as candy or other treats, etc. That won't work for really young kids, but it does work. Once your kid realizes that he can "earn" things by following directions, you'll be amazed at how fast they go to bed.

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