How do you balance being your employees' friend with being their boss?

7 Answers

lynnekingsmith | 1 year, 7 months ago

For middle managers, this might be tough. As an owner/CEO, it's not an issue. We run our company with an organic, natural feel. Everyone is an important part of the team, and we use no middle-management.

If you have to remind your employees that you are the boss, perhaps you don't have their respect in the first place?

I believe that the old model of subservience and hierarchy are dated and not working well with the current generation of workers. Teamwork, self-driven, and mutual respect keep our company working as it does. Relax, trust people to do their job. If I can't do that with any of our team, I generally don't keep them around.

I look at it as my job to set the tone.

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samsonmedia | 1 year, 7 months ago

I sometimes equate being "the boss" to parenting. Similar issues. You strive to be your kids/employees "friend" but it's a slippery slope. What I try to do with employees is be a really nice boss. Boss being the operative word. Keep it professional, never gossip or complain about other employees (remember to always complain "up" never "down"), say please, thank you, good job, etc but never apologize for being demanding as long as I'm being fair. Does that help?

http://www.samsonmedia.net

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danieljlee | 1 year, 7 months ago

From personal experience, I can say it's really tough - I ran a student-run company where I was managing other students who were basically peers, many of them my friends.

I have to say that it all comes down to managing expectations. *Prior* to a hire, there should be clear expectations that your professional and personal relationships are distinct - and that, when you are working together or interacting professionally, that's all that is. It can be difficult to manage such a relationship, but that's the nature of management - there are bound to be challenges.

It might feel weird at first, but if s/he's a good employee and good friend, you should have nothing to worry about.

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Jackovin | 1 year, 7 months ago

I think to be effective you must delineate between the two and make it clear to employees that while we are friends, I am also your boss. We are here to further enhance this business, so when necessary it is important for you to know that I will do what I have to do to make this a success. I learned early on that the type of employee you hire plays a key role into the success of this policy as well. The employees must be responsible and mature enough to know that work is work and friendship is friendship. After the first few years I was very keen in being able to pick the ones who would fit into this type of environment.

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Mike Monostra | 1 year, 7 months ago

When it comes to having a friendship with the boss, I believe there should be a rule that what happens outside of the office, stays outside of the office. The boss should not give special treatment to someone simply because they are friends with that employee outside of the office. Obviously, this rule can create some tension if that particular employee doesn't hold up their end of the work, but it's the risk of being friends with the boss of a company.

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Ritrzblok | 1 year, 7 months ago

I believe that if they are a true friend, then they would never ask you to jeopardize your career for their benefit. And if they are willing to do that, then they are simply not worth the effort. I have found myself in this situation before, and I was disappointed in the result. Quite frankly, it is easy to be the "good guy" and pal around, laugh and joke. But if you are the boss, you were hired into that position for a reason. Is everything you've worked for worth someone who would selfishly as you to risk your position? I don't think so. If it is too weird, perhaps managing or supervising is not the right job for you.

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Kurt Riesenberg | 1 year, 7 months ago

For me it all comes down to the employee. The ones that are professional enough to recognize the role they have had I have appreciate the openness I give them. Our work is built upon relationships and that means having a good one among us as well. The professionalism comes through when they know they screwed up and I call them on it, and they own up. Everyone makes mistakes but the ones that commit to fixing them do so partly because they don't want to jeopardize the good relationship they have with me. An employer needs to be able to tell the difference between the suck ups that think they are befriending the boss to help themselves, and the ones the boss should truly be friends with.

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