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3 years, 3 months ago

Ethical Debate: You caught someone having an affair, would you tell on them?

Of the following people, who would you expose (in other words, tell their spouse)?

1. A parent
2. A friend
3. A friend's spouse
4. Your sibling's spouse
4. Someone you hated
5. A coworker

Why would you tell or why wouldn't you tell? Would you do it anonymously or publicly? Does your relationship to the person being cheated on change your answer?
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newbey | 3 years, 3 months ago
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Oh Darcy, that's a hard one. Theoretically, I would confront the cheater directly. Depending on whether it was a parent, friend, friend's spouse, sibling's spouse, someone I hated or a coworker that conversation would be difficult at best. I can't keep a secret, so letting them know directly would relieve that burden. Based on the specific situation, I might go further, but it all depends on that initial conversation. Practice the "Golden Rule" whenever possible.

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morriss003 | 3 years, 3 months ago
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Unless I was related to the person being cheated on, or the person being cheated on was an extremely close friend, I would keep my mouth shut. By this time in my life, I have seen too many weird relationships to know when to interfere.

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darcy logan's Avatar
darcy logan | 3 years, 3 months ago Report

Ooo, good point. One is assuming that the other person doesn't know. It is possible that they do.

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263236 | 3 years, 3 months ago
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No way, that's not my business. that's THEIR business, not mine...and people find out about stuff all on their own, without your help

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drmatt | 3 years, 3 months ago
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I would not tell the one being cheated on until AFTER I talked to the cheater and gave them enough time to talk to their partner.

I would ONLY tell the other person if they were a close friend or close relative. I would do this because they are close to me and I want them to have the very best. I would also be able to help them through this process.

I wouldn't tell anyone else because I believe it's not appropriate for me to get involved. I have no connection to them.

I would do it "publicly" meaning I'd tell them who I was (not anonymously).

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smokenherb | 3 years, 3 months ago
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It really would depend on why the affair happened in the first place. People tend to make mistakes sometimes.

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highheelsrule | 3 years, 3 months ago Report

mistakes are mistakes choices are choices there is a difference Mistakes happen like an error choices happen because we behave toward a result
Having sex requires many steps to end in result NO MISTAKES TO CLIMAX
Certainly a choice!!

smokenherb's Avatar
smokenherb | 3 years, 3 months ago Report

I don't feel an affair has to do with only sex, I can see someone looking into another persons eyes and for some reason feel attractive to that person and maybe they kiss and kiss again but that's all they ever do. This would be another form of an affair but with no sex. So I guess it boils down to what your definition of an affair is.

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darcy logan | 3 years, 3 months ago Report

Yeah, I've heard that "I accidentally had sex with her" excuse before.

Didn't buy it then either.

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kapuaa | 3 years, 3 months ago
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All depends on the person. You would think that one should tell at the least there friend but not everyone can handle that kind of issue and sometime things can go really bad. I would rather confront the one who is cheating a put the responsibility in their hand before I intervene.

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eatthatpopcorn | 3 years, 3 months ago
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I would tell on a person only if they were cheating on my friend or someone I loved

I would tell on a person if I hated them

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